Saturday, June 19, 2010

Happy Father's Day.

Fathers are wonderful people
Too little understood,
And we do not sing their praises
As often as we should...

For, somehow, Father seems to be
The man who pays the bills,
While Mother bandage up little hurts
And nurses all our ills...

And Father struggles daily
To live up to "HIS IMAGE"
As protector and provider
And "hero or the scrimmage"...

And perhaps that is the reason
We sometimes get the notion,
That Fathers are not subject
To the thing we call emotion,

But if you look inside Dad's heart,
Where no one else can see
You'll find he's sentimental
And as "soft" as he can be...

But he's so busy every day
In the grueling race of life,
He leaves the sentimental stuff
To his wife...

But Fathers are just WONDERFUL
In a million different ways,
And they merit loving compliments
And accolade of praise,

For the only reason Dad aspires
To fortune and success
Is to make the family proud of him
And to bring them happiness...

For all my many readers I have to say for sure that I love my husband. I drive him crazy, nuts, whatever, but all in all he picked me and sticks with me. Here are the top 10 things I do to drive my husband crazy, and PROMISE not to do on father's day...

1. Ask dumb sports questions.... Asked a question that seems so logical in my mind, and is most definitely an insult to his favorite game. Then I get the eyes rolled back in his head and the look in his eye that says “are you kidding?” are common signs that I’ve crossed the sports-lingo line.

2. Have a Diet Coke obsession. I’ll admit I like a nice 48 ounce of Diet Coke or two a day. I’ll even admit that I’m fairly partial to the flavorings and which drink I will take that day – I’m am a plain vanilla girl, don’t ask me to drink plain jane Diet Coke either, I think because I am more of a Diet Pepsi girl. Evidently he thinks this is odd. I still can't figure out why

3. Do you hear that noise remark? In my defense, hubby does have a hearing problem (or so I like to think ;), but come on – everything from clunking car noises to humming appliances can drive me crazy and I drive him crazy making him find the source and eliminating it. My favorite is when I freak him out that he has to jump out of bed.

4. Start a sentence with “I was thinking…” - These words alone make him nuts – probably because it’s usually followed by something that involves work on his part – and directing on mine. But I have to admit that most of the time that is the end of the sentence because my ADD kicks in and then I forget what I am going to say.

5. Take furniture measurements and then send him to pick up said furniture – assuring him that IT WILL fit in said vehicle. Do I need to tell you that I am inept at taking measurements? – Good thing hubby figured out a long time ago that me and tape measures don’t mix! It might seem that anything handy and me will not fit. It is even funnier when it is raining and he is trying to smooch something in the car. In my defense, I really forget that we don't have a 15 passenger van. That should be blamed on my parents.

6. If I have a can of spray paint, I have to use it. My mom told me once to just not buy it and I actually think my sister mentioned that exact same thing today. I guess I didn't listen and that is why my door is half green and half brown. I had a half a can of spray paint and thought, hmm... what would this door look like brown. It looks good. BUT now what do I do?? Do I even need to go into the Painting Disaster of 2010??

7. Make plans and never put them on the calendar and then forget. Okay organization is not my strongest point – thank heavens I married a very organized marvel of a man who seems to remember everything (even things that happened 10 years ago in our marriage, but can forget the simplest of things when going to the grocery store). But I would like to apologize not only to my husband, but the entire world for forgetting about something. I am just so happy every evening when I get into bed and realize that I actually remembered all my kids when leaving the grocery store.

8. Drive, drive, driving Miss Daisy/ Go Speed Racer, Go Speed Racer. My husband has a tendency to be the main driver in the family, but on those rare occasions that I get behind the wheel. I swear he holds on for deal life. Usually words like "where is the fire" and "are you trying to kill us" are common. Now, if I am not speeding (which I have to say if I was on the I-5 in downtown L.A.... he would not be complaining) I am in the slow lane going super super slow. SO, at least I am consistent... you get the fast or the slow. AND sometimes these dang utah drivers just make me so mad I have to show them where I learned to drive.

9. Develop pack-rat ways. Getting back to my organizational inabilities – I realize I live in what I have deemed “organized chaos.” I can generally put my finger on something important within a few hours or possible a day if I need to. And I do see his point that my piles of stuff drive him nuts, but seriously, if he would just ask I could find it. It makes sense to me and I am home the most. And sometimes papers just need to be piled on the desk, for no reason.

10. Park poorly in the garage. He complains that I use the entire garage for just one SUV and then he has to "squeeze" his into the other side like he's driving an obstacle course. Yet, most of the time he just parks in the driveway because he can't fit in. Anyhow, the garage is so not in my zone, so if it is not clean, it is not my fault. Step it up, baby.

So, Happy Father's Day, Tyler... and thanks for putting up with me ;)

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