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Showing posts from February, 2011

Manic Monday Blog Hop

Super Easy Manic Monday Blog Hop.... Here are the rules

Follow the Host "Confessions of a 30ish Overworked and Underpaid Oppressed Housewife"
and follow "Retail Be Gone"
Then hop around and follow other bloggers to follow.

Sometimes You Just Need To Bust a Move

This here's a jam for all the fellas
Tryin to do what those ladies tell us
Get shot down cause ya over-zealous
Play hard to get females get jealous
Okay smarty go to a party
Girls are scantily clad and showin body
A chich walks by you wish you could sex her
But you're standing on the wall like you was Poindexter
Next days function high class luncheon
Food they're serving, you're stone-cold munchin
Music comes on people start to dance
But then you ate so much you nearly split your pants
A girl starts walking guys start gawking
Sits down next to you and starts talking
Says she wants to dance cause she likes to groove
So come on fatso and just bust a move

Suit Shopping Is NOT fun!

I love to shop. Sometimes when I am having a rough day, I can get in the car and just go to Smith's Market Place and walk around. I don't even have to buy anything, maybe a Diet Coke (HELLO!), to feel satisfied with my shopping experience. On a daily basis I usually go to J. Crew or Children's Place and fill my cart with things that I will never buy. My friend Julie was just saying yesterday that I go to the store like everyday, but the big secret is that I might go to the store, but I don't always shop at the store. I like to look around, walk around, smell the flowers, the perfume, touch the clothes, dab at the cosmetics.... just the thrill of shopping.... my emotional fix. I thought I could spend time in any store and be happy, until today when I went with Tyler to the Men's Wearhouse.

What a horrible place this Men's Wearhouse. It is a suit store and it just isn't fun. They have giant sale signs, which I normally love to read and appreciate, but the sale…

Wordless Wednesday

I Love a Good Deal on Kids Clothes

Why buy new clothes for kids, when you can swap 'em for a fraction of the price? Sign up for Free today! They'll even send you free boxes for sending in your gently used kids and maternity clothing!


Freaking Lego Genius

I don't mean to toot my own horn, but I am the Freaking BIGGEST Lego Genius of all Time. Yes, I am. Chalk it up there with all my other creative identities and I might just be the Worlds Greatest Mom, as well. Let me give you a bit of a background, I do a bit of freelance writing and am writing a book for a sales floor on how to teach kids to budget their money. As this is one of my biggest downfalls in my life, I have to write and implement the program at the same time... best to learn through trial and error if I do say so myself.

So the first order of business is allowance and teaching my son how to save his money. He is a spender, much like his mom and dad and aunties and uncles and grandparents... the list is long, but I am set on breaking that chain of command. A wonderful friend taught me that in order for kids to save money they have to have a goal... a realistic goal that will require savings and patients. Here is my plan. When my kids reach $100 …

How Mom's Bring LOVE to their Kids

A Mother loves right from the start. She holds her baby close to her heart.
The bond that grows will never fail
So I am going to HAIL the complex lessons we teach out of LOVE...

You will teach them how to pray, no sweat, with phrases like
"you better pray this comes out of the carpet".

Logic and reason will be taught this day,
"because I told you so" defines this lesson and something we all say.

Teaching them foresight is a what you meant with,
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident"

For some simple love lessons on Irony might be a tricky bit, but with the
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about" can be said in a split.

Is it raining, snowing, sunny teaching the weather can be a trick,
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it" but out of love we do this quick.

While the Lion King might sing about this family route,
"I brought you into this world, and I can take …

Wordless Wednesday

My Book of Life

To quote “You’ve Got Mail”, sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life - well, valuable, but small - and sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven't been brave? So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around?

I do lead a small and simple life. I have three kids, a house, a dog, and a husband. Pretty basic, but as opposed to the above statement, most of my life reminds me of something that should either should be a book or turned into a lifetime movie special. Check out the similarities.
Now, what makes a good book. It is the job of the writer to draw in the attention of the reader through some sort of emotional connection. The reader should be anxious to turn the next page, or in my life live the next day.This is how I wake up every morning... always wondering what the day is going to bring and how I am going to deal with it. Here is a list of my life as a book
Well-developed charact…

The Case of the Invisible Man

It was three o clock in the afternoon and the sun was shining through the window on this calm Saturday. Outside looked freezing and I watched the trees slightly billowing in the breeze. In an instant, a cold wind came whistling down the hill and slightly shook the 21st century style, two story house. In the tastefully furnished ground floor kitchen the two eldest children were pleasantly heard laughing in the next room enjoying a relaxing game of Monopoly.

Then a scream shattered the tranqulity as Emma, 4 years of age, came running into the kitchen with the look of death plastered across her face. I knew somebody had died... could it be murdered on the orient? No, we were in the North West, not the East. Phew!

"Mom, my best friend, the invisible man is dead. He was eaten by a werewolf and his heart has stopped beeping!" she tells me as giant tears swell up her eyes, "He was so nice and I really liked him."

"I am so sorry, Emma" pulling my best motherly syma…

Favorite Friday

Such is the Life of a Sex Goddess...

So I thought about it and I really do live the life of a sex goddess who at any point in time can up and travel to see the wonders of the world, right from the comforts of my home. HOW? Just keep reading.

So you wish to see the Changing of the Guards in England? Who needs that when I have the changing of the sheets. Between the bed wetting and the throw up, heck this could be a daily occurrence. Feel free to stop by anytime for this magnificent encounter. Niagara Falls? See the waterfall every 30 minutes with Emma during her potty training time. Heck, it happens in the living room, the kitchen, the bathroom. And for a twist... you never know when or where it will happen.Imagine going to FAO in New York? OR you could come on down and see all the toys in our basement. Heck, we probably have a section for everything.Travel to see the Great Barrier Reef? or you can see the great barrier of jackets that lay in my entry way. Much cheaper. They might…

Wordless Wednesday

I am Your Wife, Not a Criminal...

When I was 18 I started a quote book and wrote down every quote that I liked for the past 10 + years. On one of the first pages is a quote that says "You will never see your wife smile more pretty than she does for a traffic cop". While that may hold true in most marriages, mine it just won't work. We had been married for 9 years before Tyler decided he wanted to go back to his original plan when we first fell in love and become a police officer... which is great for me. I was raised to do what you want to do... Kinda like the Talladega Nights mentality of "I'm a winner and winners can do what they want"... well I guess exactly like that. So he became an officer and our arguments and activities have changed a tad bit since that happened (not like crazy hang cuff sex activities though, just the interrogations in our relationship).

I learned quickly though that being married to a cop isn't like somebody who is married to a 9 to 5 er. While you might have …